I think every woman who’s been pregnant knows this feeling I’m having: I’m 36 weeks (so I’ve been pregnant for 9 months but the person that created the whole “9 month” concept was actually just screwing with us because we’re actually pregnant for a full 10 months (40 weeks)) and READY TO HAVE THIS BABY. I just hit that moment…. I’ve gone from “I can’t wait to have this baby, he’s going to be so beautiful, I love him so much” to “GET THIS THING OUT OF ME!”
On top of everything… I’ve gotten stretch marks this time around and they’re getting worse the longer he’s cooking. Please moms, don’t hate on me. I know stretch marks are a super common thing and that many women who get pregnant get them. But… I didn’t get them with my first baby so I was really hoping I’d luck out and not get them this time! When I showed my husband he said, “Those are battle scars… you’ve been carrying these kids and of course they’ll leave a mark. They’re not ugly… they’re part of the journey.” So sweet, right? Why can’t I think the same way?
Is it crazy that I hoped that, even though my body wouldn’t be the same as it was before I got pregnant, I wouldn’t have any permanent marks on my body? Does that make me anti-feminist? I saw this amazing picture of a woman’s belly who has had a child: excess skin, stretch marks, and it was beautiful. It had these amazing words written under it, basically saying that every hiccup, every kick, every time the perfect baby moved was documented on the skin of the mother. That’s a beautiful thought but honestly, I was wearing a bikini a couple of months after my first was born (I wasn’t perfectly flat on my front or sides but that’s okay!). How long will it take for these f’ing stretch marks to fade?!
On another note, I am just READY FOR THIS BABY! I am sick of waking up every hour to pee and having to ask my husband for a push out of the bed. I am tired of my maternity clothes…. I just want to feel stylish and sexy again! I was joking with a stylist where I work that my proportions are so off right now: I’ll come up with a cute outfit in my head and when I put it on, everything looks SO tight because of the belly. I just want to be trendy again and not worry that if I raise my arms my stretch mark-covered belly is hanging out the bottom!!
I realize that this is by far my whiniest post. However, if you’ve ever been pregnant I think you’ll understand. I’m not trying to be whiny, I just want to have this child. I just want to hold the beautiful baby boy I’ve been carrying for 9 months in my arms… and I also want to be able to stand up without having to brace myself and go pelvis first. Is that too hard to ask?!